2020 - First ZOOM Job Interview

"I used McDonald's ice cream as an anology"

Helloo there! It's 4 A.M. I'm just working on some Safaascarves designs. It's been quite a crazy week. Been falling rock bottom ever since the job interview which I will elaborate about. Also, been hustling for safaascarves. But can I just emphasize how calm and peaceful it is to work at night? Although it screws up my body clock but I feel like I am the most productive at this hour. I think the reason would be because everyone's sleeping and there is minimal background "noises".

Well, I've been super super low for the past one week and it's all about overthinking. LIKE HOW DO YOU GIRLS STOP YOURSELF FROM OVERTHINKING??? LIKE DO YOU FEEL ME?? There will be those days you just want to think about things. People would say like keep yourself busy but in that busy-ness, something somewhere will just trigger your thoughts and you end up stopping whatever you are doing and just screw yourself over again and again. That shit is (hell) irritating and I can never understand why we are made like that while there are man out there who doesn't think much. Like why are men and women so different? But here's the tea lah okay - I've been so confused of my career path. I know I know. I've been repeating this for like the past (maybe) 5 post or so over the years. BUT I CAN'T HELP IT?! I can't help it to overthink that what my future will be like or am I even doing the right thing? Am I going to the right path that is right for me? Am I making a huge mistake? Or is this actually a great path for me. WELL, WHO KNOWS RIGHT. And this goes back to our faith and having trust in Allah s.w.t. Putting trust in Him that everything will be okay in the future and it's okay to like.... fail sometimes. Because probably that's a way of how He is telling us like, "there is another path for you there, why would you still be trying if you keep failing?"

YOU ARE NOT TOO HAPPY BUT ACTUALLY NOT BAD LEH To be honest, I dreaded the whole filling in the employment form and interview sessions because this is probably my 5th interview and I don't think I will get it. It's not that I am being negative or anything but you know that feeling... the feeling of walking into McDonalds, wanting to buy Mudpie McFlurry but you only realise THEN you have $1.50 with you so you just get a Chococone. Then you realise, "eh not bad eh Chococone. I actually crave for chocolate and vanilla ice cream actually. So doesn't matter lah"

What I am trying to say is that a failed interview makes me unhappy because I just failed like how I failed buying the Mudpie McFlurry. But when I make money somewhere else, I realise that it's not the job that I want. It's actually the money. Like how I actually craved for chocolate and vanilla ice cream combined but it doesn't matter what form of it.

BACK TO THE INTERVIEW STORY

*GIVES A HUGE SIGH* Can I say how I dislike ZOOM interviews???? PERIOD.

There were so much distractions in the background and the huge rain and thunderstorm made it worst as I couldn't listen clearly. Apart from that, everyone was wearing like facial mask and I couldn't read the lips of the interviewer. I was slightly annoyed and frustrated to the point it actually triggers my anxiety till today. The interview was done exactly a week ago and I couldn't even move on from it. Thus, this post. But it was so cool because if my interview starts at 10.30 a.m., I could just wake up at 9.30 a.m. and just get ready with super light make up. Let's just say that it was one memory I would like to remember. My very first ZOOM job interview. I would like to think that this ZOOM would be around long-term and I would be probably laughing at this post in a few years time. But that's the entertainment. HAHAHA

May Allah s.w.t. bless us always and give us light in our hearts to stay calm and peaceful. Aamiin. ♡

thepinkrosette