What is next?

" The only person you should try to be better than is the person you were yesterday"

Blogging on a Sunday afternoon. It's 3PM now and I just officially woke up. The reason is that I didn't sleep for over 30 hours (which isn't healthy btw!) and for the past few days, I've been studying late nights and my sleep time would be from 7AM to 12NOON which makes me a little jetlag. Can I just advice that whatever I did was NOT HEALTHY AT ALL??!! It was also my very first time not taking a good 7-8 hours rest before an exam paper and I regretted it A LOT. I got more forgetful and I had a hard time concentrating during exams. I dozed off for a good 10 minutes in the exam hall. It wasn't really healthy, trust me. I also got some of those jetlag symptoms like to get irritated easily, I get so hungry and the worst was I am having flu. Well, the good thing is, I hope it was all worth it as exams are officially over and if all goes well, I'll be graduating in November, in shaa Allah!

So what's next? Work out plans, just focusing more on my religious class exam and spending time with my piano. I don't really plan on going out with people because (I don't really know why?) as you get older you just wanna stay home and "laze" around. Especially when there is so much to do at home and you don't have to go out.

With that being said, I feel that as you get older, things around you will change so much. Especially in your 20s, you will be shifting from one environment to another at a very short time. You have to adapt very quickly and have that mindset that you can't be too comfortable at a spot. Also, it is very very important to make yourself comfortable in every different situation because that's just life. You don't get to choose things and it just comes to you. It comes and leaves and another set of problems will arise and it just goes on and on.

So it doesn't matter if things are changing even if you are at a young age because not everything is permanent and not everything will be the same forever. Except yourself and your own mind and experience or even memories. That is one of the reasons why blogging or writing would be so useful in the future. As I read back my blogs one day, maybe, 5 or 10 years later if I'm still living, I want to remind myself that all the tough times I've been going through is actually worth it. Also, everything that happens NOW will be shaping who I am in the FUTURE.

I will also be excited to see where I am in 5 or 10 years time. Will I be married? Married to the person whom I truly love right now? Will I have a child? Will I still be working? Will I be happiER with myself and life in general? Will I be already achieving my dreams to share my words of advices with the world? Will I already be skilled enough to entertain people by playing the piano? So many uncertainties yet so many goals in mind.

For now, just keeping the circle small and keeping my mind with positivity and being healthy. Just that. Ignore all negativity and whatever people have to say about you because all that does not matter. Don't have a mentality that you have to explain yourself to everyone why you are acting in a certain way or why you push people away. The hard truth is that people won't care. People won't care what happens behind the scene and they will always judge you for your actions and feelings. However, you know you have the rights to feel that in your situation. Only you understand it because others are not going through what exactly you are going through and that's okay. It's okay. Don't assume that everyone has this thing called EMPATHY. If you have it, then you are just a highly respected person but don't question why others can't be like you.

I pray that everyone would find their own happiness one day and truly understand how your happiness does not rely on others. ♥

thepinkrosette