Rest Well

" Don't be too attached to the world because it is just a temporary place"

WHERE DO I START? *letting out a huge sigh while trying to control my emotions* Let's start with what happened last week. 19 April 2018 Something HUGE really hit my family hard - a news that was somehow difficult to process and manage. But Alhamdulillah, we have been handling it well and I have been really strong for my family. All of us have been there for each other. My family gathered (grandmother, uncles and aunties) and as usual, we talked at the dinner table about everything and anything. However, one thing that made it so unusual was when my grandmother started talking about what she dreamt. So my mom kind of shush her off by saying "If it isn't a good dream, don't talk about it and say prayers". Thus, my grandmother insisted, "Okay, how about a good dream?". We asked her what it was and she said she dreamt that she lived in a nice house with my late grandfather and her then living elder sister. It was just a random conversation - that was what we all thought. 20 April 2018 I actually did blog but I never really posted it because I just felt like I didn't want to. My emotions were all over the place. 21 April 2018 I woke up at 4 AM with the sound of my mom shouting that my dear grandaunt passed away. Shock? SUPER shock. However, she passed away at 1 AM. I was not informed of any severe diseases she was suffering from but she only had low blood sugar. But when asked to be admitted, she insisted because she wanted to take care of her husband. Ma shaa Allah. That is when I knew she deserved this rest so much. And my aunt, who my grandmother was staying with, told us that my grandmother has been dreaming about people passing on and the people whom she knows who have passed on - that was the 'bad dream' that she actually wanted to tell us.

My Relationship with my GrandAunt I can honestly say that I wasn't the closest to her as compared to my other family members but I can tell that she really impacted me so much. She is the most patient women I have ever met in our family. She had a lot of "takpe... (nevermind...)" moments and we all realised that - those close or not close to her.

She puts others first before herself. And I remember, when we didn't eat her dishes (which I regretted) during Hari Raya, she wouldn't SHOW that she felt upset. She would ask every single one of us of a HUGE family to actually eat - yes, every single one of us.

And as we left her home, we would always hug and she would kiss my cheeks on both sides and say "study hard and take care of your mom." For all the love I was deprived for, you gave me one I cherished the most because I could only receive your love, once a year. For the very last time on the 21st April, you could not kiss my cheeks again but I kissed yours, making prayers that you will rest well and that Allah blesses you in so many ways in the akhirat. I can't do much but to just pray for her and be a really good lady with great values she had. I really felt that huge impact on the loss of my GrandAunt, I couldn't imagine how would I feel when it was my Grandmother's turn or anyone I loved so much. Allahu. What amazes me more is that my emotions are finally stable now. I feel the calmness in me right now, alhamdulillah, which I couldn't feel for the past weeks! End of April It's been one-third of 2018 and I started this year with an intention to just stay more positive but Subhanallah, Allah also tried to mould me into someone stronger and wiser in so many ways (even I am shock). I can safely say that nowadays, I left my childish past aside and tough times leads to maturity and being wiser.

I pray that everyone would be stronger and I hope everyone is managing well in life, even if you are struggling, we will all get through it ♥

thepinkrosette